Sunday, March 27, 2011

Springtime Potential Romance Checklist.

Do I like this person?

Is this person interesting?

Am I attracted to this person?

Would I like to sexually connect with this person?

Is there anything wrong with that?

Am I ready for the emotional strings that form related to getting closer to someone?

Is there a chance that this would be a long-lasting connection?
I think about that, now that I am more "mature".

Is there some sense of resonance on "non-trivial issues"?

Can I ever know everything about what might happen?

Might I be able to know more?

What do I need to know to feel safe about moving forward?
(Think on this.)
* what do I want?
* what is this person looking for in me?
* do these answers fit into a possible scenario that doesn't harm either person?

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone


Eco Yogini said...

wow. this was a well thought out checklist. very concise and insightful questions.
I hope it has helped :)

(yay springtime romances!!)

Claudia said...

Great questions! I would add, if i may, "Am I myself in front of this person? or do I pretend to be someone else?" "Do I like the person I become when I am with this person"? "Do I feel like I can be long term friends with this person, at the gut level?"

Nobel said...

Wow, sounds exciting! If you stay grounded (as in engage mulabandha), I'm sure you will make the best decisions in this area.

Emmanuelle said...

Oooh, nice checklist. Hope it's helped you make the right decision for you :)

Meredith LeBlanc said...

Do we laugh together as well as enjoy quiet together?

Those are my big ones.

Lot of love

Brooks Hall said...

Thanks, Everybody! I found myself going through this list with myself as I was getting out of the shower, and thought that it might make a useful blog. Unless your first romantic match is PERFECT, people probably go forward at some point with their hurt hearts and try to figure out how to approach moving forward in a conscious way.

Going through writing the thoughts down did help by giving me a window into what is going on in myself!

And I appreciate the additional tips and support.

I'm not sure if it was really helpful to put it out in public, like I did (we'll see…), but it was a way to express things I might not have been able to otherwise.

Seems too intense to say directly, yet I don't know how to move except from where my mind is right now. I thought about taking this post down—perhaps it is too much. And it really is just me working with myself!

Yet, I also don't want to fall into a pleasant love, only to experience another layer of hell in the near future. And I don't want to cut myself off from the pulse of vibrant connected life either!

It's been much easier to have crushes on people who live far away, or gay men—easier because these are not people I can reasonably date. It keeps me at a distance, and I'm tired of my own B.S. I'd like to try to realistically move forward, and to do that I have to discover what that means for me.

Thanks to any kind souls who read to this point.

Be well.

Unknown said...

This is very insightful as are the comments! For me, finding my mate, was such a non-intellectual experience (and I'm not talking about the physical realm at all). I just "knew" but on such an intuitive basis. It was like we had "known" each other for years, but we had just met. Our future was there before us as if it had already been written. There was no doubt when I found my soul mate. Hope you have some of that "gut knowing" too!

Michelle Margaret said...

Brilliant, thank you for sharing! It's funny because obviously no checklist is ever complete, especially for something as mysterious as romance, but this list provides some excellent and thoughtful guidelines.