Grateful for Technology

This day seemed radically shorter and I'm grateful for technology. This gratefulness has come after some iPhone problems...

On Saturday night my iPhone died. Nada. Kaput. After several attempts at revival, I told myself that I might enjoy the quiet this event could allow. I had a plan for going to the Apple Store the following day. It would be fixed then, I thought. ...and I wasn't bothered after that. So easy, it seemed: no iPhone for a while.

Well, on Sunday I arrived full of hope at the Apple Store on Michigan Avenue. Several cute guys tried to help me. However, my iPhone was really dead, and the technicians were booked all day and there were already several people standing by just in case someone didn't show up for their appointment. And I was scheduled to teach yoga that afternoon. So I did what I could do. I made an appointment for today during a break between classes. But not before I freaked a little. When this adorable man told me what was up I was truly crestfallen, and was somewhat horrified when tears came to my eyes. I just looked up at him and said, "I'm freaking out. I'm sure you understand... I'm out of COMMUNICATION." He left to see what he could do, and I thought about how manipulative that might have looked. Eventually he came back just to let me know that the situation stood, and I was okay. By then I was composed, and thanked him for his help.

When I was a couple blocks away I wondered how this break in communication might be a blessing for me. And thought I'd just have to find out.

This morning I rode the Ravenswood Brown Line to go teach, and I just sat there. It was dark on the way to my 7am yoga session. This is the time I usually do a blog-related activity on my iPhone, either contributing to my own blog or reading what others have written, and perhaps commenting. And I realized that my life was a little better with the iPhone. There are pockets of time in my day when I am out and about between classes that I enjoy working on my iPhone. It's great for me.

Today when I was in the store waiting for my appointment I ran into a yoga teacher friend, and she sat down and we talked until I had to go for my iPhone. They gave me a new one. It works perfectly in the old case! With information it can work this way... It's not the individual machine that is important, what's important is that the information gets passed on. And I thought about how true that is.

As I age it seems like I am constantly being delivered a new body, but what's important is that "I" keep living, and continue exploring this experience openly. Somehow I am the same person, held together by my memories, but there are times when I feel totally new and very different from the person I once was. Maybe I got a software upgrade... Or maybe I just really like my iPhone.

Technology and Breasts

Last night I was recharging my iPhone and I looked to check for emails about my blog and it was totally blank! I've had this little miracle for just a couple of months, but you might think that it was a vital organ by the way I was trying not to freak. I pressed the little button to wake it up, and all I got was the blank stare of a white screen! Was my lifeline in a coma? It had not fallen so it could not have been the dialated pupil of a concussion. I just plugged it in for it's nightly nourishment and it was over the next time I looked.

It was sort of like I lost a boob. I associate compassion and warmth with breasts, and I had temporarily lost something that was feeding me. I have thought about what it might be like as an infant receiving food from the cosmic breast. In the early feeding Mom has not been conceptualized yet, and there is just this wonderful experience that meets a need.

I have even been blogging from my iPhone. It feels so much more intimate doing entries from here than it does on my laptop. And I can manage comments from my iPhone... You got it: my iPhone, my iPhone.

So last night when it was out I was distressed and resisting that feeling. I did other things, like I showered and then I checked my iPhone. I kept doing that: I would do a little thing and check my iPhone. I checked the printed stuff that came with it and found nothing to help. Then I started pushing buttons until I heard some strange beeps I had not heard before. Then I did something else. Finally, I looked at the THING and pressed the buttons a little differently and the apple showed up on the screen: my nourishment was coming! And then after a long pause the screen showed what it usually does, and it looked like everything was fine. So far so good...

Am I proud of my behavior? No! I felt like an addict. I was unwell without this functioning communicator.

And yet it's here. It fulfills a need. ...like a cosmic breast. Communications that come through this darling little interactive and glowing mini-brick fulfill my need to be heard and recognized for thoughts that don't always work in everyday conversation. These things are important to me! And through the blog and the comments I know that there are others who value these things too.

I guess what bothers me is that I might be suckling in ignorance. But hey, it works!

Okay, so the fear is that I am using a technology that is leading people into further physical isolation. Of course, at the same time our digital connection is getting stronger... So for now as I am enjoying my new tool, I will also commit to some quality time physically together and communicating with others. And it will be great to talk with you in person, too. There really is no substitute for that.


-- Post From My iPhone